3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
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I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
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it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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