Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
