worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize