Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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