What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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