You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
