I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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