When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
