I got chris browned last night
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
