Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
