Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
