it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
