Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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