he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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