So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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