If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
