Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
