Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
