just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
