I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Non-Jews are for practice
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Randomize
