We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize