There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
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