you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize