I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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