What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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