Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
