I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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