Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
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