This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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