if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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