meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
