I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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