I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize