They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
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