You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
