I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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