My friends, they love my intelligence
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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