so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize