well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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