Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
