Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Is it normal to miss your booty call?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
