I didn't shave. On purpose
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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