Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
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