You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
