No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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