Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (857): View more from Massachusetts

  seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (857): seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable. http://tfl.nu/zho9
  Replies (214) Good night (52189) Bad night (2997)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths. http://tfl.nu/qww0
  Replies (37) Good night (1081) Bad night (2404)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations. http://tfl.nu/6vv2
  Replies (32) Good night (874) Bad night (4060)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number. http://tfl.nu/71o2
  Replies (28) Good night (1709) Bad night (4713)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better http://tfl.nu/bqq0
  Replies (7) Good night (836) Bad night (4457)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't. http://tfl.nu/avqq
  Replies (5) Good night (2684) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics

  (416): View more from Toronto

  But that's half the fun of it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics (416): But that's half the fun of it http://tfl.nu/vf29
  Replies (6) Good night (2485) Bad night (766)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday http://tfl.nu/hztn
  Replies (5) Good night (1789) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.

  (1-530): View more from California

  at least it wasnt animals

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences. (1-530): at least it wasnt animals http://tfl.nu/kq9s
  Replies (3) Good night (972) Bad night (1477)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty. http://tfl.nu/l80d
  Replies (10) Good night (2043) Bad night (547)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples http://tfl.nu/s1gx
  Replies (2) Good night (1540) Bad night (513)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now http://tfl.nu/chmx
  Replies (7) Good night (2071) Bad night (546)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off http://tfl.nu/ymwa
  Replies (13) Good night (937) Bad night (940)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.

  (1-407): View more from Florida

  That's horrible but hilarious

  (407): View more from Florida

  I'm going to miss college.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else. (1-407): That's horrible but hilarious (407): I'm going to miss college. http://tfl.nu/1mp1
  Replies (4) Good night (562) Bad night (356)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos http://tfl.nu/3cx3
  Replies (1) Good night (266) Bad night (374)

Randomize