he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
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The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
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The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.