So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
We were destined to go to rehab together
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
When are your genitals available?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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