Pregnant stripper...not hot.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize