do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
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