My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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